Catholic Marriage Preparation: Pre-Cana Programs and Requirements

Catholic marriage preparation, often called Pre-Cana after the wedding at Cana where Jesus worked his first miracle, is the program every engaged couple completes before a Catholic wedding: meetings with the priest or deacon, a premarital inventory, a marriage preparation course or retreat, and usually a class in natural family planning, normally spread over about six months. Its purpose is not to test the couple but to help them understand the sacrament of Matrimony and build a strong marriage. Below are the usual steps and timeline, the main kinds of programs, the paperwork, answers to common questions, and prayers for engaged couples.

A short prayer for an engaged couple, written for this page:

Lord Jesus, you blessed the wedding at Cana with your presence.
Bless (names) as they prepare for marriage: help them to know each other more deeply,
to speak honestly, to forgive quickly, and to build their home on you. Amen.

The usual steps and timeline

Requirements vary from diocese to diocese, so always ask your parish first. A typical path looks like this:

Contact the parish where you plan to marry, usually at least six months (often up to a year) before the wedding date, before booking a reception hall.
First meeting with the priest or deacon to set a date and begin the paperwork.
Premarital inventory, a questionnaire each partner answers separately, which the priest or a sponsor couple then goes over with you.
Marriage preparation course (Pre-Cana day, Engaged Encounter weekend, sponsor-couple sessions or an approved online course).
Natural family planning class, required or strongly encouraged in many dioceses.
Planning the liturgy: readings, music and the order of the ceremony.

Kinds of marriage preparation programs

Pre-Cana day or evenings: talks by married couples, a priest and often a counselor on communication, finances, sexuality, faith and family, held at a parish or diocesan center.
Engaged Encounter: a weekend retreat for engaged couples, with talks and private time for the couple to talk and write to each other.
Sponsor (mentor) couples: a married couple from the parish meets with you several times at their home.
Premarital inventories: questionnaires such as FOCCUS or PREPARE that help couples discuss expectations, family background, money, children and faith.
Online courses: some dioceses accept approved online programs, especially for couples who live far apart or in the military. Check with your parish before signing up.

The paperwork

A recently issued baptismal certificate (usually within the last six months) from each Catholic’s parish of baptism, which shows any later marriage or annulment notes.
Proof of confirmation and First Communion, in some dioceses.
The prenuptial questionnaire completed with the priest.
Affidavits of freedom to marry, often from parents or friends who have known you a long time.
A civil marriage license from the state or county.
If either of you was married before, a declaration of nullity (annulment) for that marriage must be granted before a new wedding date can be set.

Common questions

Can a Catholic marry a non-Catholic?

Yes. A marriage between a Catholic and a baptized non-Catholic Christian needs permission, and a marriage with an unbaptized person needs a dispensation; the priest arranges both. The non-Catholic partner also takes part in the preparation.

Do we have to be registered at the parish?

Usually one of you should be a registered member of the parish, or obtain permission from your own pastor to marry elsewhere.

What if we already live together?

The Church still welcomes you to prepare for marriage. The priest will speak with you about it honestly and with respect.

Scripture for engaged couples

Jesus on marriage (Mark 10:6–9, Douay-Rheims):

But from the beginning of the creation, God made them male and female.
For this cause a man shall leave his father and mother; and shall cleave to his wife.
And they two shall be in one flesh. Therefore now they are not two, but one flesh.
What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.

The prayer of Tobias and Sara on their wedding night (Tobias 8:7–10):

And Tobias said: Lord God of our father, may the heavens and the earth, and the sea, and the fountains, and the rivers, and all thy creatures that are in them, bless thee.
Thou madest Adam of the slime of the earth, and gavest him Eve for a helper.
And now, Lord, thou knowest, that not for fleshly lust do I take my sister to wife, but only for the love of posterity, in which thy name may be blessed for ever and ever.
Sara also said: Have mercy on us, O Lord, have mercy on us, and let us grow old both together in health.

A prayer while preparing for marriage

Written for this page.

Lord, we thank you for bringing us together.
As we prepare for our wedding, keep us from being so busy with the day that we forget the marriage.
Teach us to pray together, to listen to each other, and to give ourselves to each other as Christ gives himself to the Church.
Mary and Joseph, pray for us. Amen.

More for your wedding

Texts and sources

Mark 10:6–9 and Tobias 8:7–10 (Douay-Rheims).
Code of Canon Law, canons 1063–1072 (preparation for marriage) and 1124–1129 (mixed marriages).