A Catholic wedding is the celebration of the sacrament of Matrimony, in which a baptized man and woman give themselves to each other for life before God and the Church. The heart of the ceremony is the exchange of consent, the vows, in which the bride and groom themselves are the ministers of the sacrament; the priest or deacon receives their consent in the name of the Church (Catechism 1623).
This guide covers the requirements and preparation, the order of the ceremony, the Catholic wedding vows, the readings you can choose, and practical questions.
Requirements for a Catholic wedding
- At least one partner is Catholic. A Catholic may marry a baptized non-Catholic with permission, or an unbaptized person with a dispensation, granted by the bishop through your parish.
- Both are free to marry. Neither has a prior marriage still considered valid (a previous marriage may need a declaration of nullity) and there is no other impediment.
- Canonical form. The wedding normally takes place before a Catholic priest or deacon and two witnesses, in a Catholic church (canon 1108). Exceptions require permission.
- Preparation. Most dioceses ask couples to contact the parish six months to a year before the wedding.
Marriage preparation: what to expect
- First meeting with the priest or deacon to set the date and begin the paperwork.
- Documents: a recent copy of the Catholic party’s baptismal certificate (usually issued within the last six months), statements of freedom to marry, and permissions if needed.
- Marriage preparation program: a weekend retreat, a series of classes or sessions with a mentor couple (often called Pre-Cana), sometimes with a relationship inventory.
- Natural Family Planning class, required in many dioceses.
- Planning the liturgy: readings, music, Prayers of the Faithful and ministers.
- Confession before the wedding is strongly encouraged. See how to go to confession.
The order of a Catholic wedding ceremony
A wedding can be celebrated within Mass (usual when both are Catholic) or outside Mass (often recommended when one spouse is not Catholic).
- Introductory rites: entrance procession, greeting and opening prayer.
- Liturgy of the Word: first reading, responsorial psalm, second reading, Gospel and homily.
- The Celebration of Matrimony (see below).
- Liturgy of the Eucharist (within Mass), with the Nuptial Blessing after the Lord’s Prayer.
- Concluding rites: final blessing of the couple, signing of the register, and recessional.
The Celebration of Matrimony
- Questions before the consent: whether the couple come freely, will love and honor each other for life, and will accept children lovingly from God.
- The consent (vows).
- Reception of the consent by the priest or deacon.
- Blessing and giving of rings.
- Optional local customs, such as the arras (coins) and the lazo (cord) in Hispanic and Filipino weddings.
- Universal Prayer (Prayers of the Faithful).
The Catholic wedding vows
The bride and groom, joining their right hands, express their consent in the words of the Church. The usual form in English is:
I, N., take you, N., to be my wife (husband).
I promise to be faithful to you,
in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health,
to love you and to honor you all the days of my life.
In the United States an alternative form may be used: “I, N., take you, N., for my lawful wife (husband), to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part.” The consent may also be given by answering “I do” to questions asked by the priest.
Can we write our own vows? No. Because the consent makes the sacrament, it must be expressed in the Church’s words. Couples can share personal words at the reception, or write them in a letter to read to each other privately.
The Church teaches that the consent creates a bond that “can never be dissolved” between baptized spouses once the marriage is consummated (Catechism 1640).
Choosing the readings
Couples usually choose one reading from each group in the Lectionary:
| Old Testament | New Testament | Gospel |
|---|---|---|
| Genesis 1:26–28, 31a | Romans 8:31b–35, 37–39 | Matthew 5:1–12a (the Beatitudes) |
| Genesis 2:18–24 | Romans 12:1–2, 9–18 | Matthew 5:13–16 (salt and light) |
| Genesis 24:48–51, 58–67 | 1 Corinthians 12:31–13:8a (“Love is patient”) | Matthew 7:21, 24–29 (house on rock) |
| Tobit 7:6–14 / Tobit 8:4b–8 | Ephesians 4:1–6 | Matthew 19:3–6 |
| Proverbs 31:10–13, 19–20, 30–31 | Ephesians 5:2a, 21–33 | Matthew 22:35–40 (the greatest commandment) |
| Song of Songs 2:8–10, 14, 16a; 8:6–7a | Philippians 4:4–9 | Mark 10:6–9 |
| Sirach 26:1–4, 13–16 | Colossians 3:12–17 | John 2:1–11 (the wedding at Cana) |
| Jeremiah 31:31–32a, 33–34a | 1 John 4:7–12 (“God is love”) | John 15:9–12 / John 15:12–16 |
| Revelation 19:1, 5–9a | John 17:20–26 |
Two favorites, in the Douay-Rheims translation:
And the Lord God said: It is not good for man to be alone: let us make him a help like unto himself.
And the Lord God having formed out of the ground all the beasts of the earth, and all the fowls of the air, brought them to Adam to see what he would call them: for whatsoever Adam called any living creature the same is its name.
And Adam called all the beasts by their names, and all the fowls of the air, and all the cattle of the field: but for Adam there was not found a helper like himself.
Then the Lord God cast a deep sleep upon Adam: and when he was fast asleep, he took one of his ribs, and filled up flesh for it.
And the Lord God built the rib which he took from Adam into a woman: and brought her to Adam.
And Adam said: This now is bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called woman, because she was taken out of man.
Wherefore a man shall leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they shall be two in one flesh.
Put me as a seal upon thy heart, as a seal upon thy arm, for love is strong as death, jealousy as hard as hell, the lamps thereof are fire and flames.
Many waters cannot quench charity, neither can the floods drown it: if a man should give all the substance of his house for love, he shall despise it as nothing.
The Gospel of the wedding at Cana:
And the third day, there was a marriage in Cana of Galilee: and the mother of Jesus was there.
And Jesus also was invited, and his disciples, to the marriage.
And the wine failing, the mother of Jesus saith to him: They have no wine.
And Jesus saith to her: Woman, what is that to me and to thee? my hour is not yet come.
His mother saith to the waiters: Whatsoever he shall say to you, do ye.
Now there were set there six waterpots of stone, according to the manner of the purifying of the Jews, containing two or three measures apiece.
Jesus saith to them: Fill the waterpots with water. And they filled them up to the brim.
And Jesus saith to them: Draw out now, and carry to the chief steward of the feast. And they carried it.
And when the chief steward had tasted the water made wine, and knew not whence it was, but the waiters knew who had drawn the water; the chief steward calleth the bridegroom,
And saith to him: Every man at first setteth forth good wine, and when men have well drunk, then that which is worse. But thou hast kept the good wine until now.
This beginning of miracles did Jesus in Cana of Galilee; and manifested his glory, and his disciples believed in him.
Prayers of the Faithful for a wedding
The Universal Prayer after the vows is often read by family members. For ready-to-use intentions, see our Prayers of the Faithful for a Catholic wedding, examples of the Universal Prayer for marriage and how many Prayers of the Faithful there are in a wedding.
Practical questions
- Can we marry on a Sunday or during Lent? Weddings are possible, but on Sundays and solemnities the readings of the day are often used, and during Lent the celebration should be simpler. Weddings are not celebrated during the Easter Triduum.
- Can we marry outside a church? Normally a Catholic wedding takes place in a church; the bishop can permit another suitable place.
- Music: choose sacred music appropriate for the liturgy; ask your parish musician.
- Cost: parishes usually suggest an offering for the church, musicians and servers.
- Already married civilly? A civil marriage can be convalidated (blessed) in the Church. Talk to your parish.
Frequently asked questions
What do Catholic wedding vows say?
“I, N., take you, N., to be my wife (husband). I promise to be faithful to you, in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health, to love you and to honor you all the days of my life.”
How long is a Catholic wedding?
About 30 minutes outside Mass, about an hour within Mass.
Can a Catholic marry a non-Catholic in the Catholic Church?
Yes, with permission (for a baptized Christian) or a dispensation (for an unbaptized person) from the bishop, obtained through your parish.
More wedding and marriage pages
- Ave Maria (Schubert and Gounod)
- Psalm 128 (the wedding psalm)
- Panis Angelicus
- Mass of Thanksgiving
- The responsorial psalm
- Catholic prayer for marriage
- Prayers of the Faithful for a Catholic wedding
- The seven sacraments
- Patron saints of the family
- Prayers of the Faithful for a wedding anniversary Mass
- The St. Raphael prayer (for a future spouse)
Texts and sources
- Scripture: Genesis 2:18–24; Canticle of Canticles 8:6–7; John 2:1–11, Douay-Rheims Bible (Challoner), public domain.
- The Order of Celebrating Matrimony (second typical edition; English translation for the USA, 2016): order of the rite, questions and consent (short quotation of the consent), Lectionary options.
- Catechism of the Catholic Church, 1623 and 1640; Code of Canon Law, canons 1063, 1086, 1108 and 1124.