The Church has a special prayer for deceased parents, based on the fourth commandment: “O God, who hast commanded us to honour our father and mother, have mercy on the souls of my father and mother.” Praying for your parents after their death is one of the most beautiful ways of continuing to honor them, and the Church has always encouraged children to have Masses offered for their parents and to remember them in daily prayer. Below are the traditional prayer, prayers for their anniversary, for visiting their grave and for those who grieve, together with Scripture.
A short prayer for my parents, written for this page:
Lord, thank you for my father and my mother, through whom you gave me life.
Forgive them whatever they need to be forgiven, reward all their love and sacrifices,
and bring them together into your eternal home. Eternal rest grant unto them, O Lord. Amen.
The traditional prayer for deceased parents
From a Catholic prayer book of 1883:
O God, who hast commanded us to honour our father and mother, have mercy on the souls of my father and mother; and grant that I may see them in the glory of eternity, through Christ our Lord. Amen.
This prayer echoes the collect “for father and mother” of the Roman Missal’s Masses for the dead. Then pray: Eternal rest grant unto them, O Lord, and let perpetual light shine upon them. May they rest in peace. Amen.
St. Augustine’s prayer for his parents
St. Augustine closed his account of his mother’s death by asking all who read his Confessions to remember both his parents, Monica and Patricius, at the altar (Confessions IX.13):
May she rest then in peace with the husband before and after whom she had never any; whom she obeyed, with patience bringing forth fruit unto Thee, that she might win him also unto Thee. And inspire, O Lord my God, inspire Thy servants my brethren, Thy sons my masters, whom with voice, and heart, and pen I serve, that so many as shall read these Confessions, may at Thy Altar remember Monnica Thy handmaid, with Patricius, her sometimes husband, by whose bodies Thou broughtest me into this life, how I know not. May they with devout affection remember my parents in this transitory light, my brethren under Thee our Father in our Catholic Mother, and my fellow-citizens in that eternal Jerusalem which Thy pilgrim people sigheth after from their Exodus, even unto their return thither. That so my mother’s last request of me, may through my confessions, more than through my prayers, be, through the prayers of many, more abundantly fulfilled to her.
Prayer on my parents’ anniversary
Written for this page.
Lord, today I remember my father (or mother), (name), who died on this day.
I offer you my prayers and this day’s Mass for them.
If they still need your mercy, bring them quickly into your light. Amen.
Prayer at my parents’ grave
Lord, here lie the bodies of my parents, waiting for the resurrection.
I believe that you are the resurrection and the life.
Give them rest, and give me the strength to live in a way that would make them proud and please you. Amen.
Jesus said (John 11:25–26, Douay-Rheims):
Jesus said to her: I am the resurrection and the life: he that believeth in me, although he be dead, shall live:
And every one that liveth, and believeth in me, shall not die for ever. Believest thou this?
Honor your father and mother
Exodus 20:12 (Douay-Rheims):
Honour thy father and thy mother, that thou mayest be longlived upon the land which the Lord thy God will give thee.
The commandment does not end at death. We honor our parents by praying for them, keeping their memory, forgiving their faults, and handing on the good they taught us.
Prayer for comfort
Psalm 26:10 (Douay-Rheims):
For my father and my mother have left me: but the Lord hath taken me up.
Lord, now that my parents are gone, I feel like an orphan, whatever my age.
Be my Father, and let Mary be my Mother.
Comfort me, and help me to keep the faith they gave me. Amen.
Frequently asked questions
How can I help my deceased parents?
By having Masses offered for them, praying the Rosary and other prayers for them, gaining indulgences on their behalf, and doing good works in their memory.
Should I keep praying for my parents years after their death?
Yes. Many Catholics pray for their parents every day of their lives and have a Mass offered on each anniversary.
Is there a patron saint for those who have lost their parents?
Many turn to St. Joseph, patron of a happy death, and to St. Monica, whose son prayed for her after her death.
More prayers for the dead
- Prayer for a deceased mother
- Prayer for a deceased father
- Prayers for deceased loved ones
- Mass intentions for the dead
- Novena for the dead
- Catholic prayers for the dead
Texts and sources
- Patrick F. Moran, The Catholic Prayer Book and Manual of Meditations (1883), Prayers for the Dead, public domain (Wikisource).
- St. Augustine, Confessions, Book IX.13, trans. E. B. Pusey (1838), public domain (Project Gutenberg #3296).
- John 11:25–26; Exodus 20:12; Psalm 26:10 (Douay-Rheims).